Today in sadness: cut out carbs and red meat'll still kill you

I've been on a keto diet for the past month and change. I love it! I can eat all the meat, dairy and nuts I want to! I snack on beef jerky, cured meats and nuts when I'm hungry. I can still enjoy a lot of the vegetables I love! I can--oh shit. From Popular Science:
In a recent study in The Lancet as well as in prior work, including this 2010 analysis, researchers have found that people who eat few carbs and rely on plant matter for their fat and protein intake—think beans and nuts—tend to be healthy, long-living specimens, relatively speaking. Those who eat few carbs and rely on animal proteins and fats, especially red meat, are the only low-carb dieters who seem to suffer for it. They tend to be less healthy in terms of cancer and cardiovascular disease, which are often the primary outcomes measured in these kinds of studies, and as a result they live shorter lives. This makes sense—plant protein is better for you than many animal proteins because plants contain less saturated fat, which can drive heart disease, and often have more fiber and nutrients.
I suppose I should be investing in a little more of all those tasty things other than red meat. And maybe cut down on the chicken. Also, fish. That said, as Popular Science is quick to point out, "these studies, like virtually all nutrition studies, are merely finding associations between groups of people who are often self-reporting data. They are large, statistically-powerful investigations, but they can only tell us about the broad strokes of nutrition."

What's more, I can't remember a single freaking week, ever, where someone wasn't quoting a study saying that what was once considered good for us is now a deadly poison. Remember coconut oil? It was a super food! Now, according to the Guardian, it'll shiv you if you look at it sideways. One drink a day was supposed to be healthy. Last week, we discovered that no amount of booze is good for you. The list, and I'm sure you've got a number of bits and pieces to contribute to it, goes on and on. Eat what you want folks: along the way, your diet will betray you and be redeemed a dozen times. In the end, we're all going to die sooner or later. You might as well nosh what feels right. Image by Starstone at Lithuanian Wikipedia - Transferred from lt.wikipedia to Commons by Hugo.arg using CommonsHelper., Public Domain, Link

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